My Ultimate BLT On Awesome Bacon T-Shirts

By Quincy Bendis

If you happen to be from a rural area, then you are probably familiar with a habit that small towns have of throwing festivals once a year. These festivals usually encompass all of the downtown area and are a pretty big deal. All of these festivals are themed toward something that holds a big significance for the area. Are there tons of cotton farmers in the area? Well, you'll probably be attending a Cotton Festival sometime that year. Our town has Pig Fest, because of all of the pig farms and the pork processing plant here in town. There is always a big cook-off with prizes awarded to the best, and I plan on winning this year. My entry name? Bacon on Bacon Crime. I even have bacon t-shirts to give away.

The Pig Festival has been going on in my town since forever, and the recipe contest has always been a huge part of it. People come up with awesome ways to cook up some delicious pork, and then make enough for a panel of judges to eat and then make a ruling on. Many of the contestants, like myself, make cool pork or bacon t-shirts to give away or sell at their booth. The competition gets really heated, and many of the locals get really into it. The awesome dishes that the contestants make don't hurt either.

The competition, in general, gets pretty intense some years. Since it is a relatively small town, there are many people who enter year after year. Three local restaurant owners compete with some really excellent pulled-pork BBQ, and have all won several times apiece. There are far more unaffiliated people, though, who come up with unique dishes for the contest. These people compete year after year, and even have groups of local residents who have styled themselves as fans of certain amateur chefs. They even go so far as to wear the pork or bacon t-shirts that were given out by their cook of choice from the previous years.

My dish this year is going to be an undefeatable monster. I have created a ranch-style rub that I will treat my bacon with, and then weave it into a flat sheet of bacon awesomeness. I will then make another sheet of bacon...and then another, just for bacon's sake. I will have a layer of sharp cheddar cheese in between each bacon layer. First, however, the bacon will be cooked by smoking it for several hours. I will then roll the bacon/cheese layers up and slice them to create bacon pinwheels. I will then make the most amazing BLT sandwiches in the world from these. I will then win. People will be wearing my bacon t-shirts and chanting my name.

Since all of my previous concoctions have been bacon-themed, I know that this year will cement me in the minds of my fans as "The Bacon Dude". Each one of these BLT sandwiches weighs in at a monstrous 1 pound, and I plan on making 30 of them to cut up for samples. I have a secret blend of rubbing spices that I will be using on the bacon, so don't even try to steal my ideas! The cherished Pig Cup trophy is coming home with The Bacon Dude this year and everyone is going to be wearing my bacon t-shirts next fall!

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